With some of the most popular holidays celebrated in the United States on their way, it’s safe to say that we all must be psychically and mentally prepared for absolute chaos over the next four weeks. If you’re at all celebrating the holidays this year, that means family, friends, loved ones, and even your in-laws that give you dirty looks for no reason may be joining you over the holidays. s This is just the beginning! In case you haven’t realized yet, all of these people are secretly hoping for some kind of gift from you.
Let’s fast forward a couple of weeks to the last hours before our official holidays begin. Everybody is ready to drink too much spiked eggnog and open presents next to their fireplace. A Charlie Brown Christmas is playing on the new TV that your family waited in line for instead of hanging out with you on Thanksgiving. All of your family members are close by, even your Aunt Foreman and her family made it out to celebrate the holidays with you! Unfortunately, you forgot to buy gifts for all of Aunt Foreman’s family. The best part is that her family remembered gifts for you. Her family takes note of your ignorance and decides it’s best to leave your house immediately because you have shown such a tremendous amount of disrespect to them. As the Foreman’s are frantically packing up their luggage and crying, your parents pull you aside and tell you how disappointed they are in you. This is the cherry on top of this Christmas sundae: They want you to move out as soon as possible. What could be done to reverse the last ten minutes of your now-ruined Christmas? Nothing now.
Fortunately, we have complied a list of great last-minute gifts that are available on Amazon.com so that you can avoid such an awful holiday gathering and end 2014 in a happy mood:
- “Thug Kitchen: The Official Cookbook: Eat Like You Give A F*ck” is the perfect gift for anyone you may be visiting over the holidays that enjoys preparing delicious, home-cooked meals while simultaneously letting out their inner thug in a safe, contained way. Available on Amazon.com for only $14.95 plus shipping and handling, this one is sure to take Grandma’s cooking to adventurous new levels!
- The “NECA 40054, A Christmas Story Nightlight Leg Lamp” is a miniature nightstand version of the lamp we all love and adore from the 1983 Christmas Classic, “A Christmas Story”. The NECA 40054 is available on Amazon.com for only $12.25 plus shipping and handling and is guaranteed to upset any man’s wife or girlfriend!
- The “Taste of Christmas Gift Basket” is perfect for knocking entire families off of your gift list and subliminally showing that you don’t care about buying gifts and put zero thought into anything! Inside the Taste of Christmas basket are goodies like chocolate wafer bites and cinnamon popcorn! It is available on Amazon.com for only $34.99 plus shipping and handling.
- The “Anthon Berg Dark Chocolate Liqueurs with Original Spirits” is a personal favorite of many! Know anybody that loves chocolate and hard liquor? Why not mix the two into a devious concoction that is sure to make your holiday night a forgotten one! The Anthon Berg is a set of tiny dark chocolate bottles filled with a various spirits and wrapped in a beautifully decorated plastic casing. Perfect for Grandma! The Anthon Berg is available on Amazon.com $30.07 plus shipping and handling.
- An actual lump of Coal! Is there anybody in your life that you actually do not like, but are forced to be in a close space with them for the holidays? Literally, just give them a lump of coal and joyfully watch as dirty looks ensue! Decorative bags of coal with “You’ve been naughty” stitched onto the front of them are available on Amazon.com for $4.99 plus shipping and handling.
Whatever your holiday needs may be, showing up with boring gifts or no gifts at all is unfair! A quick selection from this list may save your life!